It's been nine days since my baby boy came into the world and never took his first breath. Nine days since I went through labor and delivery, looked at his perfect little face and held his hands, and then walked out of the hospital without a baby. Nine days since I started wondering when I'd wake up from this nightmare. Now I think I'm beginning to realize that I won't.
Things are odd feeling; things are different. It's hard to leave the house and come back in again...it feels funny, like I'm forgetting something. I still can't talk to people, or even look them in the eye. But life goes on, I suppose. I laughed yesterday. It felt funny, even made me feel guilty. Who am I to laugh when my baby is gone? Why does it feel so bad to feel even remotely good?
Nine days...it feels like it's been so much longer.
1 comment:
Seems like forever...doesn't it.
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