Hi ho, hi ho, it's back to work I go

It's been a hard week. I've been back at work for a few days now, and it gets a little easier every day, but it's still hard. Everytime I leave Jacob at daycare, I cry a bit. Everytime I go to nurse him or pick him up, the little break in my heart heals some. I've been going at lunchtime every day to feed him, and that helps.

We're lucky though. We've got some really nice ladies taking care of my baby boy, and I'm so grateful for that. Julie and Cleuza and wonderful, and they make me feel like Jacob is the reason they come to work every day. I know it's not true, but it's how they come across. It helps knowing that my boy is loved.

The kids at the schools have made me feel good about being back; they've missed me, and it's a great feeling knowing that I make a difference.

So...life moves on. But it doesn't mean I have to like it!

While you are sleeping

Today is my last offical day of maternity leave. I'm sad...I can't imagine going back to work on Monday and leaving my baby boy with complete strangers. It's scary to me...who's going to protect him from all the things that could happen in life if I'm not there? But I know I have to...the rest of my family needs me to work so that we can survive...it's inevidable, and I've already been out of work eleven weeks.

Yesterday, MaLew came up to watch the kids while I cleaned house. I want things nice when I go back to work so that I'm not overwhelmed with things to do when I get home. So I worked hard all day, and she held my Jacob. Today though, I'm not working...at least not when Jacob is awake. I'll do it when he sleeps; when he's awake, I'm going to be giving him all of my attention. And when he sleeps, I'll try to get things done.

My mom had a little plaque when I was growing up...the inscription on it said,

"Cleaning and scrubbing can wait til tomorrow,
for babies grow up - I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep."

It's so true...and today, I'm going to take full advantage, because Baby Jacob won't be a baby for long...and I want to enjoy every second I can.

Ten things I love about you

Over the past few days, I've been thinking about how grateful I am that Jacob is here, safe and sound. Don't get me wrong; I'm grateful for ALL of my children. But leaving the hospital after Andrew, without a baby in my arms, tends to help me not take for granted all of the little things that babies do. So, with that in mind, I wanted to write down some of those things so that I never forget them, and so that Jacob will know one day.

Dear Jacob,

I love holding you; I love the way your little head fits snugly between my chin and my shoulder when I cuddle you close. I love the way your little baby breath smells...it's sweet and just smells like you. I love how your fingers wrap around mind when I hold your hand. I love nursing you; I love the way you can go from completely furious to completely content in less than a second when we start nursing. I love seeing your face relax and so content, know that I've been able to satisfy your needs completely. I love seeing the milk trickle out of your mouth and run down your cheek as you let go and drift off to sleep. I love how you smell after a bath, the combination of baby shampoo and lotion and just you.

I love how you're so funny about taking a NUK (pacifier); how you shake your head back and forth, all but telling me aloud how you don't want it, then you open your mouth and take it anyway - but only for a little while. I love having you in the co-sleeper at night, right next to me, where I can reach out my hand and touch you; I sleep that way most nights. I love feeling and hearing you breathe. I love your little coos of happiness, and even the cries when you're fussy. I love watching you kick your legs and reach your arms out towards the play gym that I got for you. I love that when you get tired of laying there, you can always be pacified by me holding you. I love leaning down and smelling your head: you have such a distinct smell....my favorite fragrance. I love watching you sleep; I love how you sometimes smile in your sleep as you dream your own special baby dreams.

I love so many things about you...I can't put them all down in words. But most importantly, I just love YOU, and am so thankful to be your mother.




Love, Mommy


Okay, so I guess it was more than ten things....but who's counting?

Halloween 2009

Halloween was a lot more fun this year than last. I actually enjoyed myself, which is great, because Halloween is one of my favorite holidays. (I have this hope that one day Austin and I will dress up, but I'm not holding my breath...Austin isn't much for celebrating.)

Anyway, costumes varied this year; normally I like to do matching costumes for the kids, but I let them chose this year, and it was great. Matthew was a "punk skater" (whatever that is), Jonathan was Darth Vadar, Annah was Cinderella, and Jacob was a frog!

We went to the pumpkin patch a couple of weeks back, but didn't buy a pumpkin there...too long before Halloween for it to go bad. But we enjoyed looking at them all there, and taking pictures.

We did carve a few pumpkins for my mom's halloween party, and took them for the pumpkin carving contest. Annah even one 1st place...and no, it wasn't fixed! ;)

Anyway, on the Friday before Halloween, Annah's daycare class went Trick or Treating downtown, so we tagged along, even though technically Annah isn't enrolled at the daycare right now. And boy did she have a blast!

And of course, Jacob was tagging along...

All in all, the Halloween holiday has been great. Now bring on Thanksgiving and Christmas....no, wait. I'm in no rush at all for any of my babies to grow up.

The pickle

Before Annah was born, I happened up on a beautiful ivory colored security blanket with a teddy bear head attached to it, and immediately bought it and had it monogrammed with her name. Later, I bought a second one because Annah loved it so much, and it frequently needed washing. She toddled around everywhere with it, got it into everything, wiped her nose on it, and even took professional pictures with it.

A couple of years went by, and "Baby" was still a constant at Annah's side. One day, Austin and I were having a conversation about "Baby" and Annah's love for her, and I expressed how much I enjoyed and loved seeing her with her little lovey. Austin's reply was amusing, and has stayed in my head since; he said that I could have shoved anything at her over and over and she would have gotten attached to it, and that it could have just as easily been a pickle.

We've laughed about it time and time again, so this weekend when I told Austin that I'd bought Jacob a pickle, he knew exactly what I was talking about, and he chuckled and smiled. So here's Baby Jacob, hanging on to his very own pickle!

Happy Birthday 4th Annah!

Annah's 3rd birthday is pretty much a blur to me, so I wanted to make sure that this year was great. I asked Annah's opinion on where she wanted her party, and she was pretty firm about wanting the party at Chick-fil-A, which I was completely fine with. Jonathan's last party was at Burger King, and there was a huge storm going on right in the middle of it - which left a lot lacking in the way of fun (and party guests!). So having Annah's party at Chick-fil-A was a sure-fire way of knowing we wouldn't get rained out, since the playground is inside.


Annah's been at home with me for the last six weeks (didn't figure there was much need to spend money on her going to daycare when I could take care of her myself!), so I wasn't sure if people would really come to her party, since she hasn't been around the kids in a while. But several showed up, and I was really glad for her.

She got tons of fun stuff for her birthday, and she was able to have a couple of hours of playtime with the friends that she's been missing lately. I can't believe my princess is four...it blows my mind. She's so grown up now...so big. I'm so thankful to be her mom. I often get funny responses when people find out I have only one girl in a houseful of boys, but one princess in is just fine with me. It makes her all the special!

Happy Birthday, my girl. Love you tons!

(pictures to follow soon)

Happy Birthday Andrew

Today, in celebration of the short life of our son Andrew, our family spent a while at his grave. The six of us. This was Jacob's first visit, and while I know he'll never remember it, it was important to me that we all be there.

Fall is definately here in Georgia, and today it was actually chilly. It reminded me of the days I spent at Andrew's grave in the weeks after his death. I would sit on the cold stones and cry. Today I cried as well, but it was a good feeling to be there with our whole family. I hope Andrew knew that we were there.

Some people may find it slightly morbid that I take pictures of his grave, but it's all I have of him. To have all of my children together, at one spot, means a lot to me. It felt right for the first time in a while.

Annah and I spent some time today making a new flower arrangement (using some of the flowers from a basket that was originally on his grave when he was buried), and Annah picked out a pumpkin to put there in celebration of fall. We put the flowers and the pumpkin in their place, took some pictures, and said some prayers. Then we packed up and headed home.

Happy Birthday Andrew. I love you so much...

The hardest thing I've ever had to do....

...is letting go. And honestly, I still haven't. Today is the one year mark. One year ago today, I sat in my doctor's office alone and was told that my baby no longer had a heartbeat.

It still doesn't seem real. Stuff like that happens to other people, right? Not to me, not to my family. I've spent a year sorting it out, or trying to. I haven't done a very good job. I've felt myself spiraling downward the last week or so...thinking of that day, and the next, when I delivered. Tomorrow is Andrew's birthday; had he been full-term and lived, I'd be having party. Instead I plan to go visit his grave.

I wonder how I look to other people. Can they see the huge hole that's still in my heart? Does it show that I still cry every day? I've had another baby since then...my beautiful Jacob, my wonderful boy who brings me so much hope. But sometimes when I look at him, I feel like I've betrayed Andrew; almost like I tried to replace him. I didn't....my rational mind says that, but sometimes those thought creep up on me and start eating at the still-tender spot where all of Andrew's memories are. And the hurt is there all over again.

In the last year, I've had the occasion to be around several people that have lost loved ones. What I always tell them is this: It NEVER gets better, but it does get easier. Right now, however, that feels like a lie. It's not easier, at least not yet. I hope, in time, it will...but not yet. Right now, my heart still hurts, and my arms still ache because they want to hold him. Jacob has helped that ache a bit, but then the guilt kicks in and it hurts all over again.

For now though, I am trying. I am trying to be a rock, a solid foundation for my family. To take care of the ones I have here, and to focus on bringing us all back together for eternity.

Jacob's photo shoot

I'll have more pictures soon, but for now, here's a few of the pictures I had made of Jacob in his little blessing outfit. He's such a handsome little monkey!

Bad at blogging...

Yep, I've been a slacker lately. Every time I think about getting online to post, I think of how far behind I am, and it makes me put it off a bit longer. But honest...I have an excuse!

It's been a busy month. Jacob has had a really hard time adjusting to life; nursing has not come easy to my boy (and myself this time around). We've struggled with him gaining his birthweight back (he lost a good bit after delivery), but we're finally a few ounces above it now. I think our pediatrician was close to wanting to put him on some formula to supplement his diet, but I stuck it out with breastfeeding, and the results are definately good....we're making it work!

Everyone else is adjusting too. Annah is completely taken with her baby brother, and is such a wonderful helper. She's staying home with me while I'm on maternity leave, so she's around to help out with whatever little things I need (that she can do anyway). She loves to give Baby Jacob his pacifier (which we refer to as his Nuk), and pat him when he cries, just as she's seen me do. It's so wonderful to watch her with him.

Jonathan, on the other hand, really doesn't care a lot. Well, that's not really true...he cares. It just doesn't affect him. He goes about his business like nothing's changed, which is good. He does have his moments though, when he's all about holding Baby Jacob and looking at him lovingly. But if you know Jonathan very well at all, you'll have no trouble realizing those moments don't come super often...but they're great when they do happen!

Matthew loves him like crazy; he wants to hold him all the time, and actually does a pretty good job of it. It's nice to have another set of arms that can actually do the big stuff....like holding him during his screaming fits, while I cook dinner, or help Jonathan or Annah with whatever they need at the moment. I can trust Matthew to pick him up or stand in the kitchen, holding him while I cook or load/unload the dishwasher. He's even asked to change his diaper a few times, but I'm not sure he's ready for that little bit of fun!

We're slowly getting into a routine, and that's nice. Jacob usually gets up about twice every night, so I'm only losing out on about an hour to an hour-and-a-half every night - which is totally do-able. Not sure how I'll do when I have to return to work in November, but right now I'm just enjoying every moment.

Tomorrow my baby will be one months old, and tomorrow he is being receiving his Blessing at church. For those of you that aren't members of our church, a baby blessing is simply a type of prayer said for the baby...normally their first, and it also officially gives the baby a name for the records of our church. It is a very special occasion, much like a Christening in some faiths, and I am so excited for it to happen, for a variety of reasons. I took him to have pictures made in his Blessing outfit on Friday, so I should have those pictures online in a week or so. Can't wait to see them myself!

Anyway, Mi Vida Loca.....my crazy life, but oh, ain't it grand?

More to come...stay tuned!

Jacob Austin Lewis

He's here!

I went in Thursday afternoon for my appointment with Dr. Brown, and was still only 1 cm dialted. I went straight from the appointment to the hospital and got all checked in and hooked up to the monitors, they did my blood work and then started me on Cytotec around 10 p.m. I was having contractions, but they weren't too bad, and weren't regular. I got another dose at 2 a.m., but it didn't seem to be doing much. At 5:30, I got up and washed up and changed into my own gown...I hate hospital gowns and was determined to labor in my own stuff....I've done it before and there was no issue with it. I was taken to the delivery room at around 6:45, hooked up to the pitocin, and my doctor walked in about 5 minutes later. He checked me - still at 1 cm - and broke my water!

Five minuutes after that I was having contractions every five minutes. This was around 7:15 a.m. The contractions got painful pretty fast, and by 8:30 or so, I was having a hard time dealing, but I still hadn't decided if I wanted an epidural; I'm so scared of needles, and my last epidural was very painful. The nurse encouraged me to get something in my IV to at least dull the pain a bit, so I agreed, and got a dose of Stadol, which is a narcatic, and something I've found I don't do particularly well with. Immediately I was drunk feeling...things were spinning and I was sick feeling. This is where things get fuzzy.

I wound deciding to get the epidural. They came in to do the epi, and told Austin to leave. I freaked because I was so scared anyway, but they insisted he go. Austin got very firm and told them that we'd lost our last child and that he'd appreciate a little bit of understanding...I can't remember everything that he said, because things were still spinning and the pain hadn't been relieved at all, but they wound up letting him stay if he'd stay out of the way. I started crying (or maybe I started crying harder - I'm pretty sure I was already crying at that point), and they let him come over and hold onto me while they were giving me the epidural. It was so painful and took so long. I kept having contractions every 2 or 3 minutes, and it seemed like it was taking forever to do the epidural. Austin was physically holding me to keep me from moving because I was hurting so badly. Finally it was in and I got to lay down, but I didn't have any relief yet. My right side started to get numb, but nothing changed on my left, and the contractions were getting closer and closer together and more painful. It wasn't working on the left side at all. They turned the dose up and my leg started feeling numb, but nothing else; I could still pick up my leg and move it everything. They wound up turning up the dose about five times before I was numb, and there was still one spot in my stomach that wouldn't go completely numb, but it was better than nothing.

I think this was the point (I'll have to ask Austin to read this and make sure things are in the right order) where my blood pressure bottomed out. All of the sudden my dizziness from the Stadol got really bad, and I couldn't focus. My blood pressure was something crazy low like 85/50, and Jacob's heartrate dropped to like 70 beats per minute. They put me on my side (because I couldn't move at all by then because of all the epidural meds I was getting - even my boobs and arms were going numb) and after a bit things got okay. I think Jacob's cord got pinched somehow, but eventually moving me around got it under control and his heartrate came back up. I was finally able to sit up and the nurse check me and I was 5 cm dialated. This was around 10 a.m. For some reason, she came back and checked me again just a couple (like 3 or 4) of minutes later, and I was completely dialated. They called Dr. Brown to come back and we started doing some "practice" pushes. They brought me the mirror and I could see his head and tons of black hair! They had me stop pushing because the doctor wasn't there yet, but he came in really soon, and not a minute TOO soon! I pushed a few times and Austin could see his head....I reached down and could feel him; I was truly the first person to touch him, which was awesome.

Austin says that the doctor got concerned for a few minutes because he thought Jacob's shoulder was stuck, but obviously it worked it's way out. I remember the doctor calling for someone else to come help, but I was still really dizzy at that time and it was all I could do to focus on pushing. And then he was here!

Jacob Austin Lewis was born at 11:38 a.m. He weighed 8 lbs 8.6 oz and is 21 inches! I knew he'd be big! A four-and-a-half hour labor isn't bad at all, considering how things usually are for me. I was really sick feeling afterwards, but got to hold him and nurse him for about an hour before they took him to the nursery to get cleaned up better and weighed and stuff. MaLew came and brought Annah, and Austin brought her in to meet her baby brother; it was so special. My mom was there too and then she and MaLew were able to come in afterwards and see Jacob too. Afterwards, everyone left, including Austin, and I let Jacob go to the nursery to be warmed up. I got some very much needed rest while the epidural wore off (it took several hours because of how much I'd gotten), and finally around 4 p.m., I was able to go to my room and get Jacob back.

He's so beautiful. I wondered how I'd handle being back in the hospital giving birth after my experience with Andrew last year, but it wasn't bad at all. I shed some tears, but I'm sure people understood. I am truly blessed...our whole family is.

Welcome to the world Jacob....you're in for a ride!

Coming to an end...

My appointment today went well; we have a plan! I'll be 39 weeks on Friday, and so Dr. Brown and Austin and I have decided to go ahead with the induction. I'll go into the hospital on Thursday evening to start on Cytotec to hopefully move things along. If nothing happens, Friday morning I'll start on the Pitocin.

I'm excited....I'm nervous...I'm scared. I have so much to do and so little time left. I was upset at first that we'd be waiting several more days, but I know I need to savor the time left. Tomorrow I'll spend the day with Annah, doing some Mommy/Daughter stuff...stuff that we won't get to do for a while after Jacob comes. I wonder how she'll handle a new baby...someone to take her place as the baby of the family.

Anyway....time draws near. And although I'm afraid....(what if something happens? What if he doesn't come home with us?), I'm ready. Come on Baby Jacob....your family is waiting!

38 weeks!

Today is the 38 week mark, and I'm officially ready to be done. This is the point where we thought we'd be inducing, but Dr. Brown is being adamant about waiting til next week. That's okay though....my appointment with him is on Tuesday (they're closed for Labor Day...go figure!), and I'm prepared to go in determined to make something happen this week. Dr. Brown mentioned the 10th a few weeks ago, so we're going to push for that date. September 10th is five days away, so that's acceptable to me.

As the time draws nearer, I think more and more of Andrew, who never got to this point. His birth was a fast surprise, completely unprepared, and the contrast of Jacob's upcoming birth is shocking. I wonder if Andrew's spirit is encouraging Jacob...preparing him, getting him ready for our family. I'd like to think so.

Anyway, I'm ready. So bring on the appointment, and the scheduled induction. I'd like to go into labor on my own, but I've pretty much given up on that.....so another induced birth it is....D-day approaches!

Mi vida loca!

It has been CRAZY around here, so I'll try to catch up! The last time I wrote, we were fast approaching Annah's surgery to remove her tonsils and adenoids. Before that could happen though, she got even sicker, and had to be put in the hospital. Some kind of infection...definitely NOT flu, as previously thought. We spent four days in the hospital, with all sorts of tests being ran, and still didn't have a clear picture of what was going on, but with a definite fear that Dr. Peppard (the ENT) wouldn't do the surgery because of all the medications Annah had been on.

No fear...Dr. Bowers was here! I love our pediatrician. He called Dr. Peppard and talked to him and stressed how urgent it was that the surgery was done, because Annah was one sick little girl. And Dr. Peppard went ahead with it!

It has NOT been fun. Annah came through the surgery fine, but cried profusely and refused to drink afterwards, so they refused to give her the pain meds that were prescribed for her; Lortab MUST be taken with something and not on an empty stomach. After a while, our wonderful nurse, Patsy, decided to go talk to the anesthesiologist and they gave her a bit of morphine. Wow...have you ever seen a high three-year-old? Oh my. She was funny, but she wasn't crying anymore, which was wonderful. We were able to take her home rather soon after that, and it hasn't been too terribly bad as far as recovery, but she's still not herself. She cries...a lot. For no reason that we can tell. Last night was the first night that she's slept by herself, in her bed, all night long. And that came with a midnight wake-up and crying fit about staying there. But, she stayed.

She went back to school on Tuesday of this week, and it's been hard for her...she'll only be there a few days (in fact today is her last day - Friday), and then she's going to stay home with me when I have Jacob and in the weeks that follow. Maybe I'll let her go visit for a few hours or something once a week...just to keep her aquanted with things...who knows.

Speaking of Jacob, the time is near! I'm 38 weeks, and if he hasn't shown up by next week, we're going to evict him. I'm so excited, and can't wait to hold him in my arms and see him breathing and even crying....yeah, nuts, I know. I need to take one final picture....I'm huge, but I don't care if it means he's healthy....and I believe he is. I just want him in my arms.....and the sooner the better!

Jonathan is doing great in kindergarten; he's reading! Can you imagine? It floored me when he started sound out words the other day....it's been so much fun. Matthew, on the other hand, is struggling at school; he can't seem to keep up with things, or turn assignments in on time. I'm pushing hard to make sure he's on top of stuff, but at some point, I've got to let him fall and pick himself up without my help. It's just hard to do that. He's turned into a teenager with a raging attitude, and I'm not looking forward to the next few years with him....I hope he proves my thinking wrong.

Anyway, that's the quick update...I'll be uploading pictures soon from various stuff....

Tonsils, adenoids, and general ickiness

No, I'm not giving an anatomy lesson; I'm talking about some issues that Annah is having. The past few months, she's been constantly sick. Sinus infections, tonsillitus, strep, ear infections, fevers, etc. So during a recent talk with our pediatrician, I asked him if he though she might have to have her tonsils out, and he said maybe, but we'd wait a bit. Five short days later, she was sick. Again. We made a Saturday visit to the doctor's office, where we saw a different doctor, and wound up with a referral to an ENT.

The ENT agreed wholeheartedly that she needs both her tonsils and her adenoids taken out, and surgery is scheduled for Wednesday, August 26. We're cutting it close on time...we're planning on being induced with Jacob on Sept. 7 or so. But it has to be done, and the sooner the better.

When we woke up this morning, Annah was running a high fever...almost 104. So I made a quick call to her pediatrician, who let me know that the flu is running rampant around here, and called her in a prescription for Tamiflu. It won't hurt her if it's not the flu, and if that doesn't help in the next few days, we'll head over to the office for some quick antibiotics. We've got to her get well before the surgery, because I have my doubts that they'll do it if she's still sick.

So...there's the story behind Annah's recent escipades...hopefully soon we'll have some resolution.

Oh my. I just realized at this moment, while writing this, that my nose is running and I'm feeling icky....oh Lordy.

A week of firsts

It's been an exciting week! Lots to catch up on, so here goes:

Jonathan started Kindergarten on Monday. We had gone through a rough spot getting him into just the right Kindergarten class, but I'm happy where he is. His teacher's name is Ms. Black (we met her at open house), and at first glance, she's a young kid. When you sit back at watch though, she's in control. I'm not entirely sure how she does it...but I'm glad she does!

We put Jonathan on the bus on the first day, then followed them in and got him off the bus ourselves. Good thing, since there was nobody standing outside to get the kids where they needed to be. But....I guess that happens. Anyway, we walked him to his classroom, made sure he put his belongings up, spoke briefly to Ms. Black, and left him sitting with the other early arrivals in the hallway. It felt so WRONG to leave him there, but he did fine. I'm excited for him...I think he likes it, although he doesn't talk much...he's like Austin that way. Anyway, we had a couple of issues with Jonathan eating breakfast, or getting where he needed to go, but it wasn't too bad. Overall, I think his first week was very good!

















Then Monday afternoon, Annah returned to dance after the summer off. She was so excited! Last year, the first few weeks were spent fighting with her about her actually staying in class without me. This year, she answered up loud and clear "HERE!" when here name was called on the roll, and ran into the studio after only a quick hug and kiss to me. She's such a doll!





On Friday, Matthew had his first day of school at GMC. He's a seventh grader this year, and he was a bit on the worried side that he wouldn't know anyone. Most people start off at GMC in the sixth grade, so he didn't think he'd fit in, but it turns out that he knew quite a few folks there already. We went to open house earlier in the week, and that helped him feel a little more comfortable.

Friday morning formation was a big deal....all the parents were invited since it was special event. It was neat to see him in his uniform along with everyone else. He was nervous, but after school, he said that he'd met several people and that he couldn't wait to go back on Monday! That made me feel good....he's genuinely excited about it and I think it will work out great for him. I think it's just what he needs.








All in all, it was really a wonderful week! Now if I can just get rid of this terrible cold that I have, and hurry up and have Jacob, life will be perfect!

Goodbye summer, hello school!

I'm excited. Today we met with Jonathan's Kindergarten teacher, and I'm very pleased. After a couple of days of frustration over where he'd be, I think we got lucky. Ms. Black seems like a very nice lady, and Jonathan liked her a lot. He's looking forward to Monday, and I'm excited about him starting Kindergarten. Wow...that's a hard one to wrap my head around...Jonathan in Kindergarten. How'd that slip up on me?

Next week also brings big changes for Matthew. Tuesday evening is his orientation for GMC, and he officially starts school on Friday, August 10. I made arrangements through the counselor for him to be put in the band class....he was in band at Oak Hill last year and did very well. I understand that GMC has an excellent band program and that they get to do a lot of extra stuff, like parades and trips and such...much more than he got to do before. I think he'll enjoy it, although he really wants to try his hand at baseball instead. But since that doesn't start til spring, and since Matthew isn't really athletically inclined anyway, I think band is a good place to start, especially since he's got some experience in it.

My mom and I took him on Monday to get fitted/purchase his uniforms; that was exciting and shocking all at the same time. He looked handsome, but the cost of the stuff almost gave me a heart attack. I'm lucky that my mom helped us out on the costs for a huge chunk of it...thanks again mom. I couldn't have done it alone! The cost of the uniforms and stuff was more than monthly tuition!!! Of course, I still had to seperately buy gym shoes, black dress-down (Class D)pants, white undershirts, name tags, black socks, have the Class A pants hemmed, and have his name embroidered on his jacket. Then I had to get school supplies for both Matthew and Jonathan. So things have been busy. But now it's all done and we're just waiting for the big days.

So...summer is almost over, and I can't say I'm sorry. I know you shouldn't wish your life away, but I'm really not. As summer draws to a close, it brings fall, and fall brings big changes, fun, and foremost on my mind right now, it brings Jacob. So I'm not wishing life away....I'm wishing it closer!

It's not that I don't like you...I just don't want to talk to you!

Seriously. People tend to say some really dumb things to pregnant women...I'm not sure why. But at this stage in my pregnancy, people constantly feel the need to make some kind of comment. I have started avoiding eye contact with people, thus eliminating the need for casual conversation, just because of this; most of the time, strangers are the worst. That said, here is a "Pregnant Women 101" course.

Do not tell a pregnant woman that you don't believe she can get any bigger (gonna give credit to my husband for that one, but I will say he really was joking - I hope!). Don't ask a pregnant woman, "You haven't had that baby yet?!?" If you can't tell by looking, you really shouldn't ask. Don't tell a pregnant woman that it looks like there's more than one baby in there; we are already overly conscience about our appearances...we don't need anything else to worry about.

It is perfectly acceptable to ask how much longer we have. But if our answer shocks you, please keep it to yourself. We are already anxiously counting down the days, sometimes in frustration. Don't ask a pregnant woman, "Don't you know what causes that?!?" Truly, we do! And most of us actually plan it!

The most important rule of Pregnant Women 101 is this: use common sense. If it would offend you, or even if it MIGHT offend you, it probably WILL offend us! Our hormones are so far out of whack right now, it doesnt' take much!

Don't get me wrong now...I'm not bitter at all. I just hate when people speak before they think. Chalk it up to being hugely pregnant in the 105 Georgia heat, and cut me some slack! ;)

30 weeks

Not much to report today...just wanted to take a 30 week photo, along with showing off my new haircut. I had about 4 inches cut off this afternoon....not for any real reason...just because.

8 weeks to go!

Dixie

Annah has said for months that she's going to be a vet when she grows up, because she wants to "take care of animals." Today, she got the chance to start. This is Dixie, the newest addition to the Lewis household. Dixie came to us straight from Animal Control, where she, along with the 15 other kittens that were being dropped off, would have eventually been put to sleep. I couldn't take all of the kittens, as much as it broke my heart to leave them there, but I could take one. I probably didn't NEED to, but I did. And Annah loves her. She calles her "Princess Dixie", which I think is adorable, but the rest of us just call her Dixie. She's a fiesty little thing...but she's smart, and has already figured out the litter box thing, along with figuring out how to deal with Bella. (And can I just say that Bella is doing great with her? I think eventually they'll be great friends, but it's taking some getting used to on Dixie's part.)

So....if she can survive the tiny kitten stage, where she keeps getting lost in the house, I think she'll be fine. Welcome home Dixie!

Happy 4th of July!

We spent a pretty much quiet day at home on this year's 4th. Jonathan and Annah (along with Bella!) did some playing in the sprinkler, then later some swimming in their new pool (which was given to them on the 4th by Grandma). Later the four of us went out and lit a few packs of sparklers and had fun with those. Annah accidentally ran into Austin with a couple of just-extinguished ones, and burned his arm nicely, but it was completely without fault on anyone's part, and it didn't ruin our fun. We stayed up late watching movies, then turned in for a relaxing night.

Matthew, on the other hand, had a late night, obviously filled with fun. He's spending the latter part of the summer with Austin's brother, Derek (and his family), and they all loaded up and went to Virginia Beach for the holiday. Matthew said that he saw the best fireworks display he's ever seen there on the beach. They got home late, and slept in on Sunday morning, while the Milledgeville counterpart of his family was up early (thanks Jonathan and Annah!)

All in all, I think everyone had a great 4th of July. I miss Matthew, but know he's having a great time and getting some good learning lessons while being away. Can't wait til the end of July when he comes home though!